I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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