you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
