What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
