were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
