if i died would you start the facebook group?
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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