I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
