didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Randomize
