it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
It's just like the Real World with babies
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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