this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
