know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
