Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
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