Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
