I just gift wrapped bread.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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