You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
