Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize