Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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