At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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