just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
