In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
