i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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