Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
