I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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