You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize