I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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