i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
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