Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
