oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize