I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
