We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
