we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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