You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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