Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
