Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
