She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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