He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
