I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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