he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
