pedialite and red bull = repair kit
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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