SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
