I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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