Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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