I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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