More tranny stories later!
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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