I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
