? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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