if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I need to wash the frat house off of me
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize