Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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