bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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