so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
