So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
